Submitted by a Slashdotter: Profiting From A Vague Patent HOWTO.

The comments follow the article, and rival the subject of the article in their hilarity.

>1. Obtain vague patent

>2. Enforce vague patent

>3. ???

>4. Profit!!!

...and...

A lawyer, as sailor, and a priest are trapped on a lifeboat. The sailor looks over the side, and say "These be shark infested waters." The priest look to heaven and asked "Help save us lord!"
They lawyer simple whistled. Several dorsal fins stopped circuling and headed right for the boat. They stopped in a ring as the lawyer talked to them in hushed tones. The sharks skattered underwater before the boat was suddenly lifted up, and surged forward.

The sailor gazed over the side, shocked. The sharks were carrying the boat on their backs. After a few minutes travel, they spotted land ahead. The priest said "Saint's be praised."

The boat slid onto the beach, and the three men stepped out. As they did another school of sharks appeared, and began depositing fish on the shoreline, before swimming away.

The priest said, "God has answered our prayers."

The lawyer turned and said, "Nah, this is just professional curtesy."

Ah, Lawyers.