There was an interesting development in my quest for the monkey butler. Last night at work, as I flipped through the channels while taking a break, I ran across the story of Oliver the humanzee.
Could this be the missing link between monkeys and butlers? Could there be a population of monkey butlers in Congo looking for work as I type this sentence?

To the detriment of his resume, Oliver did enjoy a nightcap consisting of scotch and 7-up. This makes his hireability questionable, since it's unacceptable to have the help dipping into the scotch. He also enjoyed cigars, and it would probably stink up the house with tobacco smell. There is also anectdotal evidence that he made improper advances toward women, which would also be grounds for termination of employment. However, the development is still promising.

Watch the show if you can find it. For real, it's creepy.